Tipsy
by Bladam-Shevine
Summary: Kyle had never particularly enjoyed parties. They were loud, crowded, messy and he hated being the only sober person in a room full of drunken idiots. All he wanted to do was find Stan, but unfortunately bad luck always seemed to find Kyle first.
1. Chapter 1

Kyle had never particularly enjoyed parties. They were loud, crowded, messy and he hated being the only sober person in a room full of drunken idiots.

Kyle was never fond of drinking. He just never found the pleasure in it. Why Kyle had agreed to attend Clyde's recent party he didn't know.

Everybody was talking about it in school earlier that day. It was a Friday night and Clyde's parents were out of town. Clyde promised everyone that there would be plenty of booze, and of course the news spread fast.

Kyle looked around the room. There were people everywhere. He couldn't even walk without bumping into someone. He came to the party along with Stan and Kenny, his two best friends, who had disappeared into the mass of people the minute they walked through the front door.

He made his way through the crowd to try and find the two boys. It didn't take long to find Kenny, sitting on the couch along with Craig, Tweek and Bebe passing a joint. Kyle shook his head at the blonde-haired boy. If there was anything he hated more than alcohol, it was drugs.

"Have you seen Stan?"

Kenny shook his head before taking a puff.

Kyle kept walking around looking for his friend, but was unfortunately ran into by a certain Eric Cartman.

"Get out of my way fatass."

"Shut up you stupid Jew."

Kyle rolled his eyes and tried to push his way past the chubby teenager. Cartman blocked his way. "Where do you think you're going, Jew?"

"I'm trying to find Stan. Now move out of my way."

Cartman grabbed the red-head's arm. "Are you still sober?"

"Yeah. I don't drink, fatass."

"You're such a fucking pussy."

Once again, Kyle tried to push his way past the boy, and this time he succeeded. He made his way into the kitchen and raided the fridge in search of a pepsi. He found one and turned back around only to be faced by none other than Cartman, once again.

"What do you want?"

Cartman held out a beer. "A peace offering."

"I already told you, I don't drink."

"You're not going to have any fun here, unless you do."

Kyle shook his head. "Somebody needs to be the responsible one."

"Goddamit Kyle stop being such a fag and just have one beer."

Kyle sighed and realized that Cartman wouldn't leave him alone until he took the beer from him. Whatever, one drink wouldn't kill him. Kyle took the can from his hand. "Fine fatass. I'll drink it, but will you promise to leave me alone?"

Carman smirked, "Sure Kahl."

Kyle cracked open the can and took a sip. _Disgusting._

He then exited the kitchen and made his way back into the living room where the music was blasting. Kyle sat down on the couch next to Kenny. "I can't find Stan anywhere."

Kenny shrugged his shoulders. "He's probably off trying to hook up with Wendy."

Kyle groaned and took another sip of beer. _Of course he'd ditch me for a girl._

"Dude, since when do you drink?" Kenny questioned, staring at the can in the Jewish boy's hand.

"I don't… At least I barely ever do. I only took the drink so that fatass Cartman would leave me alone. I'm kind of getting used to the taste actually."

Kenny laughed, "Well good for you. You're finally opening up yourself to the world of partying!"

Kyle smiled. "Yeah I guess so."

It was at that moment that Butters came running into the room. "Hey guys! We're going to play spin the bottle! Come on!"

Kyle and Kenny sighed simultaneously. "Seriously? Spin the bottle? We're seventeen, not twelve…"

"C'mon guys it'll be fun!"

"Whatever." The two boys got up and joined the circle of teenagers that was forming in the middle of the living room.

Kyle noticed Stan making his way into the living room and walked over to sit beside him and Wendy.

"Oh hey Kyle!" The raven-haired boy exclaimed excitedly. "Long time no see!"

"Yeah dude. I've been looking for you for at least an hour now. Where have you been?"

"Oh you know… Just hanging around." He said, smiling at Wendy.

"Well, thanks for ditching me."

They all took a seat as spin the bottle was about to begin.

"Alright who wants to spin first?" Said Bebe, taking control of the game.

"I'll go!" Said Clyde, the host of the party.

He reached out and spun the glass bottle and everyone anxiously waited to see who it would land on. When it finally stopped, it pointed towards Red. She blushed as Clyde began to lean forwards into the circle.

"Ready?" He asked.

Red nodded and leaned into the kiss. It wasn't long, but there was definitely some tongue action. Everyone whistled at the two teenagers making out in the middle of the circle.

"Okay guys, get a room. I want a turn now." Said Craig.

Clyde and Red stopped their kiss and returned to their seats.

Time passed and more and more of the South Park High School students took their turn at spinning the bottle.

Kyle hadn't even noticed he finished his beer until he went to take a sip and realized there was none left. As much as he hated drinking, he was kind of disappointed that he ran out as he was suddenly feeling very thirsty.

He watched as Bebe and Token took their turn to kiss in the middle of the circle. He was trying to pay attention to the game, waiting for his turn, but began to notice that the room seemed to be spinning. He was feeling kind of nauseous.

Quietly, not wanting to draw attention to himself, he turned to Stan. "Dude something's wrong… I don't feel so great."

"How many drinks did you have?" Stan asked.

"Just one…"

"Dude you're fine then."

"No, dude, seriously… I feel like I'm gonna-" Before he could finish his sentence Kyle puked a mass of vomit all over himself and the ground in front of him.

"Dude!"

Everybody started laughing hysterically at the redhead, especially Cartman. "Hahahahaha! What a fucking lightweight!"

Stan grabbed Kyle by the arm and pulled him up to his feet and towards the bathroom. He practically dragged Kyle all the way to then toilet as the shorter boy stumbled behind him, struggling to walk. Stan forced Kyle to kneel down in front of the toilet as more vomit made his way out of his mouth. Stan stood there, concerned as Kyle seemed to not be acting like himself.

"Are you sure you only had one drink?"

Kyle nodded, the movement making him feel sick, causing himself to puke again. Kyle was struggling to keep his eyes open as he felt very weak all of a sudden. He heard Stan talking to him, but couldn't quite make out what he was saying.

"Kyle?" Stan asked. The redhead was slumped over the toilet bowl, barely awake. Stan was contemplating calling an ambulance as the boy's skin looked extremely pale. _Could it be alcohol poisoning? He said he only had one drink…_

Stan was startled by a knock on the bathroom door. He opened it and found Kenny standing there.

"Dude… There's something you have to know."

"What?" Stan asked, worried for the answer.

"I heard Cartman telling Butters about this 'practical joke' he decided to pull on Kyle… And uh…"

"What did he do Kenny?"

"Dude… He spiked Kyle's beer… With roofies."

Stan felt his face go red with anger. "What the fuck!?" He instructed Kenny to stay with Kyle as he stormed into the living room. He saw the fat boy laughing his ass off and immediately ran over and pinned him against the wall.

"You fucking roofied him!? Do you know how dangerous that is? What the fuck is wrong with you Cartman?"

"Relax dude, he's fine isn't he? I just thought it'd be funny to see the Jew-boy completely fucked out of his mind."

Stan couldn't hold back his anger anymore and punched the fatass square in the jaw. The other boy cried in pain and Stan made his way back to the bathroom to check on his best friend.

Kenny was sitting on the floor next to Kyle, whose head was slumped against Kenny's shoulder. He wasn't conscious.

"We should take him home." Kenny said.

Stan shook his head. "If his mom finds out he was drinking she'd kill him. He can spend the night at my place. My parents and Shelley won't be home until tomorrow afternoon."

"Okay." Kenny said. "Help me get him up."

Stan bent down and put one of Kyle's arms around his shoulder and Kenny did the same with the other arm. They dragged their friend out of the house, no one really paying attention to the three boys.

They supported their friend's weight the short distance to Stan's house. They eventually made their way inside and up the stairs and finally dropped Kyle onto Stan's bed. "Make sure he sleeps on his side, in case he vomits again." Kenny said. Stan nodded and placed some pillows behind Kyle's back to prevent him from turning over.

"I'll stay up all night and keep an eye on him, just in case something happens." Stan said.

"Good idea. You sure you're okay alone? I can stay if you want…"

"Nah it's okay dude. It's late. Go home and sleep. I'll text you tomorrow and let you know how he's doing. "

Kenny nodded and made his way out, leaving the two boys alone.

Stan pulled up a chair next to the bed and got out his laptop to watch some Youtube videos. He tried to distract himself on his computer, but couldn't stop himself from looking at Kyle. He felt so bad that he wasn't there for him at the party. He could've prevented all of this from happening. He should've known that stupid fatass was up to no good.

He sighed and watched Kyle sleep soundly, the guilt of not being there to protect his super-best-friend overwhelming him.

"I'm sorry Kyle." He said, reaching out to pull the blankets over Kyle's body.

"I'll never ditch you for a girl again."


	2. Chapter 2

Kyle awoke the next morning to the sound of a toilet flushing from across the hall. He sluggishly opened his eyes to the unwanted stream of light coming in from behind the curtains. He groaned at the sudden realization at how awful he felt. His head was pounding, he felt weak… Was he hungover? _No… I only had one drink._ As he sat up in the bed he noticed that his surroundings were unfamiliar. He wasn't in his own bedroom… _What the hell?_

His thoughts were interrupted as Stan Marsh made his way through the bedroom door. He looked surprised to see the red-head sitting up in bed.

"Dude! You're awake! How are you feeling?"

"Like complete shit…"

Stan frowned at the boy's answer. "Do you remember what happened last night?"

Kyle shook his head.

"You don't remember anything at all?"

Kyle searched his memory for the last event he could remember. "I was looking for you all night, I had one beer, and then we went to play spin the bottle… But everything seems foggy after that."

Stan sighed. "Shit dude. I don't know if you want to know what happened."

"Tell me." Kyle braced himself for the answer he was about to receive.

"Well… That beer that Cartman gave you, he spiked it… With roofies. He was trying to play a practical joke."

Kyle stared at Stan in shock, not believing what he heard. "Jesus Christ."

"You almost died dude… I was so scared. That fatass is gonna pay for this."

Kyle just sat there staring into space. He felt anger boiling inside of him.

"Kyle?"

"Hmm?"

"How do you feel?"

"I feel like I'm gonna-" Before he finished his sentence Stan thrust a trash can into his hands which he was grateful for as he vomited the contents of his stomach. Stan rubbed Kyle's back as he continued to heave into the trash.

"Kyle… Do you want me to drive you to the hospital? I should've brought you there last night…"

Kyle shook his head. "No. No hospital… Please… If my mom finds out what happened I'll never be allowed out of the house again."

Stan nodded. "Okay."

"I'm going to fucking kill that fatass."

"Not if I get to him first."

Kyle looked up at his best friend. "Thank you, Stan. For saving my life last night."

Stan smiled. "You have Kenny to thank too… I couldn't carry you by myself."

The two boys laughed.

It was then that Kyle felt his phone vibrate in the pocket of his sweater. He pulled it out and looked at the call display.

 _Mom_

"Oh shit."

Kyle rushed to answer the phone while trying to think of an explanation why he didn't come home last night.

" _Hello?"_

" _KYLE BROFLOVSKI WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!?"_

" _Mom… I'm sorry… I slept over at Stan's last night."_

" _And you didn't think to inform me of this!? Your father and I have been worried sick! We thought you could be lying dead in a ditch somewhere!"_

" _I'm sorry mom… I'll be home soon, okay?"_

" _You better be! And we're going to have a long chat when you get here young man!"_

The call abruptly ended and Kyle choked back his fear.

"She uh… She sounded really mad…" Stan said.

"Yeah, she is. I gotta get home dude."

"Wait Kyle… Let me walk you home…"

"What? I only live a couple blocks away dude I think I can manage…"

"Please, Kyle. After what happened last night… I just want to make sure you're safe…"

Kyle rolled his eyes. "You're sounding like an overprotective boyfriend."

Stan laughed and grabbed his coat. "C'mon dude… I can use the fresh air anyways."

As Kyle flung the blankets off of himself and stood up a sudden wave of dizziness overcame him and he fell to the floor, hard.

"Kyle!" Stan was by his side in an instant. "Are you okay?"

Kyle nodded, though the movement made his head swim. "Yeah… I'm fine. Just got lightheaded there for a moment."

Stan's eyebrows furrowed in anger. "Those drugs really fucked you up. Seriously the next time I see that fatass he's going to end up in the hospital."

Stan helped Kyle to his feet and the two made their way outside and towards the Broflovski household.

After Stan arrived home and ensuring once more that Kyle was okay he collapsed on his bed.

 _What a night._

He didn't realize how tired he was. His phone buzzed on the dresser beside him and he picked it up to read a text from Kenny.

" _Hey… Is Kyle alright?"_

Stan typed back. _"He was still a bit sick this morning… I walked him home just a few minutes ago. I think he'll be fine."_

Kenny replied almost immediately. _"You walked him home? How cute."_

Stan rolled his eyes. _"Shut up. I was really worried about him."_

Stan was about to shut his phone off and take a nap when he received one last text.

" _Whatever you say… Lovebird."_

Stan stared at the message in front of him. He knew Kenny was just messing around, but something inside of him couldn't stop himself from thinking that Kenny might be right. Sure, Kyle was his best friend and their friendship had gone back since kindergarten… But was he really acting like an overprotective boyfriend?

Kyle was cute, with his red curly hair that he always tried to hide under his green hat.

" _Woah Stan… Why are you thinking of Kyle like that?"_ He thought to himself.

Stan quickly shook his head to erase his thoughts. No… he wasn't crushing on Kyle… His best friend… A guy… He was straight! He hooked up with Wendy just the night before! But why was he so concerned about the Jewish boy's safety? Sure friends are supposed to look out for each other, but Stan was beginning to think of how upset he would be if something worse had happened to Kyle last night. If he hadn't been there…

 _I don't think I could live without Kyle…_


End file.
